Groundhog Day

For those of you who’ve read my blog often you know that I have a lot of memories tied to music. There are movies too that bring some fond memories to mind. Many years ago when the internet was new – to me at least – and I was doing a lot of online chatting with my very slow dial-up modem. (I could write a whole blog post on the “Modem Song”) I met a guy online. I fondly referred to him as Rhode Island Rob from the internet. He came from Rhode Island to Florida to visit me. The night he got here, Groundhog Day was on television. We had a really nice weekend. He went back to Rhode Island and I stayed in Florida and we drifted apart but I have the nicest memories of that weekend and no regrets. So Rhode Island Rob wherever you are today, thanks for the memories.

Musical Memories – A Confession

I have to confess.  I cut.  I am guilty of what I refer to as emotional cutting.  You know those songs that leave you feeling like you’ve been punched in the stomach or kicked in the teeth.  Usually I try to avoid them.  But every once and awhile, I have to subject myself to the pain.  The first notes of those songs will start and I know how I’m going to feel but I keep listening.  My heart aches, the tears sting my eyes, I wallow in the pain.  I’ve shared a couple of those songs.  Right Here Waiting for You and One More Day there are others too, but today I am sharing the one that cuts to the bone.  It’s another song about the one that got away, the man that I thought was my soulmate.  The one that I was willing to put up with pretty much anything just to be with him.  It’s been over 20 years now since I’ve seen him and I have gone on with my life but, every once and awhile I have to listen to songs like this one and  take myself back there and feel that pain again,  When it was good it was really good.  This song pretty much sums it up. 

From the movie Buster, Phil Collins, singing Groovy Kind of Love

So John if you are out there and happen across this it was very groovy while it was good.

Loved Him Then, Love Him Now – Alan Jackson

I loved him when he was singing about the Chattahoochee.  I camped on that river.  I knew exactly what he was singing about. 

Loved him when he sang Drive.  My Daddy let me Drive too.  I can relate and Alan told it/sang it perfectly

We all loved Alan ten years ago when he shared our pain and sang Where Were You When the World Stopped Turning.

Loved him when he shared his memories with us in Remember When.  

Loved him then and I love him now.  Alan Jackson is a great storyteller singer and when the songs he sing help tell the story of your own life it’s extra special.  Thanks Alan.

Musical Memories – One More Day

Okay so it doesn’t take me to a specific place and time but it makes me remember.  I actually just had a conversation about just how bad the one more day could be for me but sometimes…. it’s all I want just one more day.  One of those good days when everything was right, when all was well and good with the world.  Just to catch up.  To laugh a lot to cry  a little to share everything that’s happened in all these many years.  Just one day.  But would I be satisfied?  Would it be enough?  Would it make things better or worse?  Would the longing be gone or would it be worse than ever?  Maybe somethings are better left undone. 

Musical Memories – Love The Way You Love Me

So you’ve probably guessed my son’s dad and I are not together. While things didn’t work out between us things weren’t always bad. He made me laugh a lot. He was a lot of fun to hang out with most of the time. Unfortunately, Responsibility and good life choices weren’t his strong points. But there were good memories. There’s not a particular part of this song that makes me think, “oh that was just like him” maybe it was just the timing. All I know is when I hear it I only think the most pleasant thoughts of him. So Kevin if you ever happen across this blog, Thanks. I do think of you and thank you for the most wonderful son a mom could have.

Musical Memories – A Montage for My Brother

There are some songs that always make me think of my brother.  My brother is eight years older than me.  So in 1974 when I was eight he was sixteen.  So we weren’t always really close.  But I guess I looked up to him in many ways.  I learned to love muscle cars especially Mustangs from my brother.  I learned to appreciate some music that I might not have otherwise.  From 8 to 12 I would probably not thought twice about Led Zepplin or Paul McCartney and Wings or Eric Clapton.  It was the Bay City Rollers for me.  Of course I did appreciate Kiss and Elton John but it was pretty much pop stuff except for my the music my brother listened to and exposed me to when we were growing up.  We camped a lot as a family so my brother and I spent a lot of time riding in the back of my Dad’s truck.  He being older and bigger won out with the choice of music we listened to on trips.  There are three songs that always take me back to the back of that pick-up truck and camping trips.   I just remember it being fun and can almost hear my brother singing along with the choruses.  “I shot the sheriff but I did not shoot the deputy”   I can hear him now.  Here are those songs. 

Musical Memory – Secret Lovers

We weren’t cheating but there was someone we tried to avoid.  Let me start at the beginning,  I was 19 life was good.  I was having a good time.  I was living with my brother and sister-in-law and my nieces.  I had a good job and plenty of free time.  That’s where I was when I met Ron.  He was older, handsome and in the Army.    Ron was an MP and his company had the opportunity to be extras in a movie with John Lithgow Resting Place filmed at Ft. McPherson.  Since they got paid to be extras there were lots of young men with extra money, needless to say there had to be a party.  They rented a cabin at Lake Altoona and after purchasing food and much too much alcohol we made our way to the Lake.  When Ron came to pick me up he had a friend with him, Wayne.   Have you ever met someone and known you were destined to be together (at least for awhile)?  That’s what happened.   It was a long time ago (1985 ) so the memories aren’t perfectly clear, but I think Ron went into the store to pick up a few things and left Wayne and I in the car and by the time Ron came back our fates were sealed.  Well before Friday night wa over Wayne and I were together Ron was not happy and I can’t say for certain if he left Friday night or Saturday morning.    I was 19 and in love I didn’t care.   Wayne and I had to get a ride home with one of the other guys on Sunday.    We were the couple that would annoy me to no end today,  we took PDA to new heights.  

Wayne and I spent as much time as we could together being an MP and working security type details he worked odd hours.  I was a telephone operator and worked odd hours but when we could find time we were together.   Soooo Why Secret Lovers?  We didn’t hide anything,  but we did try to avoid Ron as much as possible (he outranked Wayne) and there was their female Sargent who was Ron’s friend and seemed to have it in for Wayne.  The other reason is the line “In the middle of making love we notice the time, we both get nervous cause it’s way after 9:00” makes me think of all the times rushing to the base to get him to work on time because we’d waited to the very last minute to leave. 

I was living with my brother and sister-in-law and my two nieces at the time.  Wayne was so sweet to my older niece (he would have been to the younger but she was a tiny baby) we took her to the park and he helped her feed the ducks.  He was so sweet that when he left his jacket at our apartment DeAnne picked it up and hugged it to her and said, “This is my boyfriend’s jacket.”  Kids and dogs they say are the best judges of character.  She loved him.  I loved him life was good.

What went wrong?  Why didn’t it last?  It’s actually pretty crazy, it was the days before cell phones and even pagers for the most part.  We didn’t have e-mail or Facebook.  Wayne lived in the barracks and a pay phone was the only way I had to get in touch with him.   My brother and sister-in-law were moving to Florida I moved in with a roommate and got a new number.  I left messages for him can’t swear that he got  them.  We just lost touch.  Sad sad sad.  If I had it to do over I would have gone to the base and found him.   But I can’t fret over what might have been I just enjoy the sweet memories and wonder every once and awhile what’s he doing now.

Musical Memories – The First Kiss

For as long as I can remember songs have taken me to some very specific memories and I’ve been sharing some of that on Facebook.  It’s time now to take those little Facebook blurbs and expand  So today’s son is Gimme Three Steps by Lynyrd Skynyrd. 

It was the summer I turned 14.  My family spent almost every weekend caming at West Point Lake on the Georgia /Alabama line.   My parents spent a  lot of time out fishing.  Fish ran at night so many nights I Was left to my own devices.  That summer my campground friend was Loretta.  She and her family traveled in a converted bus going places where her father could find work.  Loretta’s cousin was staying with them at the time.  He was tall and blonde and very cute.  He was older too.  Probably much too old and too experienced for me.  At that time I was still very naive and very innocent.   James, the handsome cousin, was not innocent at all.  He may have been the first bad boy I’ve been attracted to over the years.    I’d gone to see Urban Cowboy for my birthday.  So my head was filled with the romance of Bud and Sissy.  I knew someday I would grow up and Could I Have This Dance would be the song they played for my first dance at my wedding reception.  Ahhh to be young and in love, at least with the idea of being in love.  So what does all this have to do with Lynyrd Skynrd and my first kiss?  Just trying to set the tone.  We spent a lot of time just hanging out, by the pool or around their campsite.  There was some hand holding and such but all very sweet and very innocent.  Lots of listening to the radio too.  That was the summer I discovered Lynyrd Skynyrd.  Sitting at a picnic table outside the bus that was James and Loretta’s home at the time I first heard Gimme Three Steps.   James sang along and the song stuck.  I think of him and that summer everytime I hear the song.  On one of those summer nights James was walking me back to my camper.  We were camped on opposite sides of the campground.  He held my hand as we walked in the dark.  About half-way to my camper he stopped me.  He pulled me against him and he kissed me.  He really kissed me.  It wasn’t really my first kiss.  There had been others, quick stolen pecks with boys in the neighborhood but nothing like this.  While he was kissing me his hands moved down my back and stopped on my butt.  That was new too.  It seemed to me that the kiss went on and on, I wanted it to anyway.  When he released me he said, “You are still just a little girl aren’t you?” I can’t remember my exact response but I assured him I wasn’t that I was grown-up enough for him and anything else he may want to do.  Fortunately, he was a gentleman and just walked me back to my camper.  There were a few more kisses that summer but none like that first one.   The time came for James and Loretta to move on with their family I gave Loretta my address and we promised, as children will do, to stay in touch forever.  I got one letter from her.  My response was returned undeliverable.  Everytime for the longest time we returned to the campground I hoped to see James again but it was not to be.  But I have a fabulous sweet memory of my not-so first kiss.

Loved Him Then, Love Him Now, HARRISON FORD

LeAnn, this one is in your honor.   Let me begin by saying how much fun it is to research these posts.   Trying to find pictures for Loved Him Then, Love Him Now, is truly a trip down memory lane.   It took me back to the age of ten when my Dad brought home a Star Wars book and movie poster.  It was different than anything I’d seen before.   It took me to LeAnn’s room after seeing  The Empire Strikes Back, we were talking to a boy on the phone – Can’t remember which one though , and I shared my favorite lines in the movie, Leia to Han: “I love you” Han “I know”.    Still one of my favorites and actually use it in reverse in my work in progress.   Thank you George Lucas and Company.   Then came Indiana Jones ahhhh Indy.  Flash forward to 1984  Temple of Doom with my high school boyfriend Matt.    Working Girl,   The Fugitive,  and Patriot Games  Good memories.   Next significant memory Six Days, Six Nights with Rhode Island Rob from the internet.   Most recently I got to share Indiana Jones with my kid on the big screen in Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.  Thanks Harrison for sharing my journey with me and taking me back.    So folks here he is from American Graffiti to Patriot Games, the incredible Harrison Ford.










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